Hebraic Musing – What happens when the Father’s role is missing?
Teachers (in
Public and Christian schools) all seem to agree with this statement: “Less than
10% of school children go home to both of their original
parents.” And these teachers are
bemoaning the discipline issues they contend with daily. How did our society here in the “Bible Belt”
wind up so far out of touch with God’s plan for our families? Thankfully, this does not apply to every
family; some families are wonderfully functional and have overcome past
re-structuring; and then, some traditional families have become dis-functional. But the 10% view is still what teachers see
(in both Public and Christian schools!).
My personal
perspective begins with growing up in WWII days when divorce was verboten; then
after the war divorces were more common.
I can remember my uncle came home after the war and divorced his sweet
and respected wife, our loving aunt! And
our family was surprised he did not move to California where “divorced” people
normally escaped to back then. Over the
generations, California had developed the reputation for divorces and broken
homes; but in more current generations, the rate of divorces and broken homes
in the Midwest “Bible Belt” is sadly now more comparable to California’s rate
years ago!!!
The traditional
role of God’s two parent system is to raise children with a combination of a nurturing
mother AND a disciplining father. I grew
up as a boy and I’ll willingly testify that as a boy, I needed discipline! God knew that. “Endure hardship as discipline;
God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his
father?” Hebrews 12:7 NIV So
the Bible agrees, sons need discipline (and respect) provided by a father. And it goes on in vs.8-9: “If you are not disciplined (and everyone
undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover,
we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we
respected them for it.” And
then in v.11 we find the purpose for discipline. “No discipline seems pleasant at the time,
but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and
peace for those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11 NIV
What does the
Bible say about the role of and need for discipline in Hebrews 12:4-11?
- Biblical discipline deters destruction
of angry kids done in love. (v. 4)
- Biblical discipline “do not lose heart
when he rebukes you,” (v. 5)
- The motive in biblical discipline is
to express love. (vv. 6-8)
- Biblical discipline teaches obedience
(v. 9)
- The result of discipline: short-term
pain and long-term gain (vv. 10–11)
If only 10% of
children have their original birth father available for discipline as a son,
how do we apply Proverbs 15:18 to the raising of today’s generation of boys? “Discipline your son, for in that
there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.” Proverbs 19:18
To be fair, I know
of a few instances where a step-father is doing an admirable job, but it is rare
and fraught with challenges.
Points
to Ponder
Are
today’s teen boys seeking “discipline” by joining “Gangs?
Are
non-biblical ideologies being promoted in school by non-Christian teachers?
What’s
happening to today’s crime rate? Why?
How
can we minister to boys who do not have a parenting father?
(Are “Youth Pastors” a sufficient substitute?)
Do
we recognize and appreciate the collateral damage from divorces?
“A fool spurns
his father's discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.” Proverbs
15:5
Yosef a.k.a. Joe
Brusherd December
2, 2025
Author: “Hebraic Insights – Messages exploring the Hebrew roots of our
faith”
“Biblical Marriage (by Yosef)” Weekly “Hebraic
Musings”
