Musing - How Important is Small Group Fellowship for Men?

 Hebraic Musing - How Important is Small Group Fellowship for Men?

My Christian walk was supported for the first five years by a weekly group of 5-6 men who nurtured me patiently.  At 7:00 every Saturday AM we shared our Piety, Study and Apostolic Action.  To this day I relish opportunities to meet with Small Groups of men who allow me to share my life.  And to sew into their lives.

Paul described the role of men’s fellowshipping perfectly in 1 Thess. 2:8  “We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us.” NIV   Paul not only shared the gospel of Jesus Christ but he also shared his life with them.  This was also exemplified in the life of Jesus who focused His ministry on 12 disciples, and an inner circle of three.  

This life-sharing is rare today.  Our society is fast-paced and information hungry so we keep a distance from one another through e-mail and voice-mail or answering machines.  Small groups have to break through these superficial, shallow relationships so Men can share face-to-face what is really going on in their lives.  
- Who can a man talk to about the troubles he is having with his teenage daughter?
- Who can he talk to about the emotional connectedness he feels for a gal at the office?
- Who can he talk to about the wounds of his past?
- Where can he go to share the joys of leading a co-worker to Christ?
- Where can he share his deepest fears as a man?

Face-to-face communication is critical to meaningful life-sharing; and this can best be done in a small group setting.  Small groups are a place to function as real Christians.  If and when I go to the “Men’s Monthly Breakfast” where there’s a large group of men there, where can I practice loving, forgiving, accepting and encouraging other men?  Leaders might brag about the size of their Monthly Breakfasts, and there can be purpose for them, but do the men also need to get connected to “one another”?

It is Biblical that men need to get together with other men and share their lives with one another.  The NIV Bible says together 386 times; one another 72 times; each other 107 times.  Just a few examples:

·         “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you,…”  (Romans 15:7)

·         “As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”  (John 13:34–35)  

·         “Encourage one another and Build each other up…” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)

·         “Carry each other’s burdens”  (Galatians 6:2)

·         “Confess your sins to each other and Pray for each other” ( James 5:16)

·         “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” (Eph.4:2)

·         “Instruct one another,,,”  (Romans 15:14)

Each of these commands can only be fulfilled face-to-face in a small group setting.  In a group of four to twelve men you can love one another, share deeply with one another, pray for one another, carry one another’s burden, accept others the way they are, and forgive others when wronged.

Points to ponder

Why do we men tend to avoid the personal sharing by going to large gatherings only?

Why do men avoid letting someone see who they really are?  Pride?  Shame?  Insecurity?

Given our hectic lives, it is hard to give “our precious time” to one another in a small group,
(BTW – Whose  time is it?)     BUT small groups grow men in Christ.

Do Pastors also need Small Group accountability?  (see “Need for small groups” below)

Are you in a small group that would hold you accountable?

♫  Getting to know you, Getting to know all about you.
            Getting to like you, Getting to hope you like me…♫  (from “The King & I”)

Yosef   a.k.a.  Joe Brusherd                                      September 22, 2020  
Author: “Hebraic Insights – Messages exploring the Hebrew roots of our faith” 
“Biblical Marriage (by Yosef)”   Weekly “Hebraic Musings”

* Inspired by and excerpted from “How to build a Life-Changing Men’s Ministry”, S.Sonderman. 2010.

Supplement - Need for small groups

In a famous survey of fallen leaders a few years ago, Howard Hendricks, professor at Dallas Theological Seminary, interviewed either over the phone or face-to-face some 242 Christian leaders forced to leave the ministry because of moral failure.  One of the questions he asked was if they were in an accountability group.  To everyone’s surprise, not a single one was.  These were good men, Godly men, Leaders who desired nothing but God’s best for them.  Yet they fell. I have come to define accountability as giving one or more men the freedom to help you order your private and public life.  A small group provides the context where tough questions can be asked week in and week out.